Wednesday, December 15, 2010

In Case You Were Wondering What We Talk About.

Marianne: I know Tracy Anderson is evil but GODDAMN:



She looks like a million bucks.

Adrien: Yes, but that's because she doesn't eat.

Marianne: Right. I love food. I have to remember this.

Adrien: Plus! She is paid millions of dollars to look like that.

Marianne: Right! I have no dollars. I am getting paid no dollars to have a stomach like a mound of deflated dough.

Adrien: Totally! If someone wanted to pay me MILLIONS OF DOLLARS to be in a movie I'd gladly eat nothing but sand for a few months.

Marianne: Ooh, the sand diet. I bet that one works quicklike.

Adrien: You're full all the time! Also: cotton balls.

Marianne: Cotton balls soaked in water, if you're really hungry.

Adrien: On your cheat day you can soak them in broth!

Marianne: Don't be silly, moddle.

Adrien: Fat-free vegan organic vegetable broth?

Marianne: Are there calories in that? Maybe you can boil some celery in water. Is that broth?

Adrien: Um, yes? That is what vegetable broth is. Derp.

Marianne: Okay, boiled celery broth is acceptable, but still seen as a weakness in character.

Adrien: You're right. Maybe just water with lemon? Is lemon weak?

Marianne: Oh my god, lemon is a FRUIT! I DO NOT THINK YOU ARE REALLY COMMITTING YOURSELF HERE.

Adrien: Oh shit, that means lemon is basically CANDY. I just threw it away!

Marianne: I think I have to sit down. I cannot believe you eat LEMON.

Marianne: Just for that, no liquids for you for the rest of the day.

Marianne: And I'm taking away your sand ration.

Adrien: I'm SORRY. I DIDN'T KNOW. You know so much more about nutrition than I do!

Marianne: Next time, ask yourself: does this taste good? Am I getting the slightest enjoyment out of it? THEN YOU SHOULDN'T EAT IT GOD.

The exception is champagne. Somehow moddles are always allowed to drink champagne. Cheers!

Adrien: Yay! I will soak my cotton balls in champagne! Can I have some cotton balls, please?

Marianne: FINE.

Adrien: THANK YOU.

6 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ya'll are SO funny :)

    More dialogue please.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm so glad you two are around to offer guidance and support!

    ReplyDelete
  4. But what happened to her face? She had some kind of work done that completely changed the way she looks, especially around the eyes and cheeks. Weird.

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.