Marianne: I need help.

I don't really know how to wear dressy skirts. I feel like I get it right maybe half the time. Maybe.

This skirt is lovely and swishy and silk, but it looks so stupid with a shirt tucked in. I think it might be too big in the waist? I don't know. I also don't know what color to wear with it other than black, which feels like a bit of a cop out.

So tell me, what would you pair with an ivory, yellow, and black skirt?

We gave Lu a toy camera. So, you know, I've got my own paparazzi now. Fancy.

shirt: Deletta, bought on consignment (similar here)

skirt: Jones New York (similar pattern here, similar cut here)

shoes: Miz Mooz Hazel (similar here)

Shorts Week Continues!

A: Oh god! Go look at the Sart today.

source: The Sartorialist

M: Oh for FUCKS SAKE. Isn't it 9257 degrees in New York? Is that a peachy linen ROMPER? HATE. HATE HATE.

A: THE WOOL SWEATER WHAT THE HELL.

M: She deserves to perish from heat exhaustion.

A: There is NO EXCUSE for that outfit. Though I have to say, she doesn't look very happy.

M: She looks like she lost a bet.

A: "Ugh, FINE. I will wear the dumb sweater over my awesome romper. FOR ONE MINUTE."

M: "Oh godDAMMIT, is that a troll taking my photograph?"

Shorts Week!

source: The Sartorialist

M: Instead of Shark Week, the SHobbit is clearly celebrating Shorts Week.

A: Is she for serious wearing all that just out shopping?

M: For me it's a total scroll down. Adorable hair, smile, sunglasses, necklaces, then those SHORTS and I think that bracelet is a lo-jack? And I love bracelets.

A: I think she's on Fashion Probation.

M: Oh, snap. Carrying a bunch of brown bags everywhere is part of her parole.

A: I like everything from her waist up, though. The necklaces and sunglasses are all good. And she's pretty. Those shorts are definitely a parole violation, though.

M: She is really lovely. I honestly would shank someone for those sunglasses.

A: I find the bag deeply disturbing. I keep coming back to it. And the grubby sandals. Why, pretty girl?

M: Those sandals are straight up awful. I think she is maybe keeping trout in the bag? For lunch.

A: So what's in the paper bags? Is it garbage that she's picking up as part of her work release?

M: Discarded fast fashion? Overflow from the Forever 21 dumpsters?

A: Oh god, I'll bet it's full of bedbugs.

M: EW. EW EW EW.

A: My work here is done.

Marianne: Like Highlights, but uninteresting.

I started out taking a normal picture of this outfit, which frankly, is nothing new. Old bridesmaid dress, old jacket, new-but-recently-worn wedges (littlest photobomber with doll potty is also not new). Then I remembered that I as recently chastised for giving the same pose over and over again. Like spot-the-difference in Highlights, but uninteresting.

And so. CLEARLY it was time for a little.....

SCARY

MONSTER.

Maybe some new poses. How about a little I'm Dancing To The Music In My Head?

Maybe a dash of Oh, You Are SO FUNNY (I Am Alone).

Then a round of Contemplating My Bosom.

Pensive Staring.

And blogger favorite, Hand In Hair.

Is that better?

Oh. Bracelets.

dress: anthropologie (remarkably similar but more expensive dress here)

jacket: Gap (similar here)

shoes: Chie Mihara Hito Wedges in curry (another cute yellow wedge here)

bracelets: mostly handmade

Adrien: Embellished.

Wow, okay, there is a lot going on here. I wanted to wear something summery with my new embellished wedges and I feel like all I wear is dresses lately, so separates. Okay! I can do this! Problem, my tops fall into three categories: 1. Striped, 2. Not Work Appropriate, and 3. Sadness.

Guess which one I picked? Yeah, not so sure this tank top is work-appropriate but it's summer and all, so whatever. It's also beaded which makes for a lot of embellishment in one outfit, but I think it all works okay?

 

top: Old Navy (similar)

skirt: Old Navy (similar)

shoes: Apepazza Gaia

bag: Juicy Couture (similar)

Intervention Time.

M: Okay, I have a confession to make. I kind of think that Ironman Robert Downey, Jr. is stupidcrazyhot.

Even if he might be wearing shoes with lifts.

A: Might be wearing lifts?

M: Just teensy, weensy lifts. Liftlettes.

A: See, I grew up with this:

So, no? But he's charming, for sure.

M: Shut UP. He was hot when he was a crazy drug-addled mess:

And he is hot now. I don't know. He is my Daniel Craig.

A: Just in case you forgot the rest of the outfit:

CHECK OUT THOSE KNEES.

M: SHUTUP.

A: The fedora? Really?  And I can play this game all day:

M: Here's the thing, I still think he is hot there. I KNOW!

A: DUDE THERE IS NO WAY.


Seriously?

M: And do you really want to make fun of the hat?

A: Now you're just being mean.

M: I KNOOOOOOW.

M: You were baiting me!

A: Every chance I get.

M:

*runs away from computer at full speed*

A: I WIN.

M: He is so adorable.

A: I quit.

Marianne: Bad Example.

After I read Adrien's post, I had big plans to show her how I wear denim skirts without looking shapeless or lumpy. I love a denim skirt, I just find that you either need to wear a top made of a sturdy material (like I did here), or I wear something that floats away from the body a bit. You can't wear anything made of a thin material that is also fitted, or it's lump city. In this case I bought this t-shirt a size larger so it would be loose. The only problem?

Well, honestly, I look a little lumpy and shapeless here. Oh well. The other outfit link above is better, at least.

Gratuitous neon accents. That's how I roll.

denim skirt: J. Crew (similar here)

t-shirt: LOFT (similar here)

bracelets: handmade

sandals: Bobbi Blue (similar here)

2 Good 2 B 4 Gotten

source: Sartorialist

M: Are those...high-waisted, pleated, drop-crotch shorts? Lord have mercy.

A: Where would you even go to buy something like that? And, even if they were in every freaking Gap, WHY WOULD YOU.

M: I am always on the lookout for something that cuts inches off both my legs and torso, and gives me a wicked case of Mom Butt. I mean, I am guessing the back looks something like these.

A: I do like to look as stumpy and short-waisted as possible when I'm wearing shorts. I mean, who wants to look leggy and tall? NOT ME.

M: Leggy and tall is for losers. I just ordered myself some of these:

A: Oh. Those are. Something.

M: I am going to look SO GOOD.

A: Um, yeah honey. You sure will.

M: I think I'll wear them with these. I hate when my ankles get cold.

A: I AM BREAKING UP WITH YOU.

M: This just made me wonder if those awful relaxed pocket shirts are still a thing and then I found the saddest model:




I know. I am breaking up with me too.

A: God, she just wants to DIE. Hopefully nobody who hated her in high school will post it on Facebook.

M: "Most Likely To Fill Her Relaxed Pockets With Rocks And Walk Into A Lake"

A: It's so sad, y'all! That pocket was down to her knees! Then she filled it with rocks!

M: You guys, do you know how many rocks that took? So many rocks.

A: My arms are tired just thinking about it.

M: Rest in peace, rock pocket girl.

Adrien: Sadness is on Monday.

The first day back after a vacation is horrible, you guys. I was happy I caved and bought a black version of the Magic Dress because it meant I didn't have to really think about what to wear yesterday. Probably not work appropriate for every office, but my workplace is pretty casual in the summer:

And an added cardigan for the office:

dress: Target Tank Dress
sandals: Aerosoles (similar)
bag: Rebecca Minkoff MAM
attitude: Bad.

It's a Plot.

A: OMG, I'm on the Banana site looking at men's stuff and they are using a very very very handsome model.

M: This guy?

I don't know if I'm feeling it.

M: Wait.

A: YES.

M: He has a more approachable David Beckham thing going. I like.

A: Yes, yes yes. And mostly likely gay. But that's not a deal-breaker.

M: He looks like he'd be fun to go shopping with. He might like to hold hands but never ever kiss with tongue.

A: Oh, he's definitely a from-the-neck-up kinda guy. He's a really good listener, though!

M: He bakes the most amazing brioche, have you tried it?

A: No, but I could use some carbs. I just went to look at the BR women's stuff and I can't stop crying. SO MANY RUFFLES.

M: What, you don't like this?

Printed ruffle tier skirt

Even the model seems pained here:

ruffled lace blouse

A: WHAT THE HELL.

M: It's like they are mocking you.

A: Oh, are you kidding? It's absolutely deliberate.


M: Hot gay boyfriend is not enough to make up for baby poop lace ruffles.

A: Truth.

Marianne: Spirit Animal.

Move over Tim Riggins. And I'm sorry Man Repeller. It turns out? My spirit animal is actually a pair of yellow ochre suede wedges.

Seriously, can you see these shoes? They make me a freaking giant and somehow go with everything I own. I may even get brave this fall and try them with opaque tights. I want to wear them All. The. Time.

Want a closer look? Indulge me. I went through a lot of eBay angst to get these for a price I could swing.

Sigh.

wedges: Chie Mihara Hito in "Curry" (another cute pair of yellow wedges here)

dress: LOFT (another muted floral dress here)

belt: anthropologie (similar here)