Marianne: The Hair Saga, part One.

My hair has been looking pretty decent lately.

Good Hair.

But I know summer is looming, and summer means wearing my hair up in braids for three solid months. Because summer means humidity and humidity means frizz. OH, THE FRIZZ.

So naturally I was intrigued by the Ion Keratin Smoothing Treatment. I picked it up at my local Sally Beauty Supply for $30, which was a much more appealing price than the $200 salon quote I'd heard. But then, I read the directions. Y'all, this is a PROCESS. To start, you wash your hair SIX TIMES with the special shampoo. Six. Times. That is a lot of times, David. Then, after stripping your hair completely, you blow dry it thoroughly. And then...you are left with this.

Do not adjust your monitor.

 I'M JUST GOING TO LET YOU RECOVER FOR A MINUTE.

Still with me? Because I feel a little faint. At this point, I put my hair in a bun and tied a scarf turban style, and went about my Saturday. Because I did not have a 5+ hour block of time to do all of this crap at once, I had to split it up.

My husband was working that night, so after I got Lu down to bed, I dove back in. In painstakingly tiny 1/4 inch sections, I brushed the keratin solution through my hair, root to tips, taking care not to over-saturate. This took...a while. I started drinking wine and watching episodes of Once Upon a Time. Then I had to blow dry it AGAIN.

One side dried, one side to go.

Still not even close to being done, y'all. Now, in even tinier 1/8 inch sections, I began to flat iron my hair. You have to go over each miniscule section 5-6 times with the iron. Took. FOREVER. Here I am at the halfway point at just before 11:00pm. This was when I Facetime'd Adrien for a pep talk.

Don't give up!

But finally, I finished. And my hair was really, really straight. And long. And Cher-like. I wish I could tell you that I loved it, but I didn't. My hair felt completely foreign, moreso than it ever has after a salon blowout.

I've got you, babe.

The real question for me is, what is my hair going to look like after I wash it (in three days)? I'm dreaming of loose, frizz free curls and waves. Of hair that I can wash and not think about beyond "dang, my hair looks good". So, what happened next? Stay tuned for part two. INTRIGUE!

Onomatopoeia.

P. S. The outfit was my uniform all weekend, a look I lovingly refer to as "kooky part time poetry teacher".

oversized t-shirt dress: James Perse (similar here and here)
footless tights: Assets
bag: Kooba "Lola" (similar- and on sale!-here and here)
sandals: Ann Taylor (similar here and super cheap here)
scarf: eBay (similar here, I like this one even more than mine!)