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Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Winter Detox or Winter Retox?

A: Have you read the Goop Winter Detox Mag? Here is what I've learned:

  1. Eating is bad for our immune system and makes us sick.
  2. If not eating makes you feel cold, simply wear more clothing. Or huddle by a fire.
  3. The recipe for the Peppermint Hot Chocolate makes me gag. 

M: Wear? Clothing? I don't get it. Also I am cold.

A: Marianne, you need to wear clothing to stay warm. Or go sit in your sauna, silly.

M: MINT FLAVORED LIQUID CHLOROPHYLL.


A: YUMMY.

M: Goodbye cruel world.

A: Clearly somebody needs a glass of room temperature lemon water.

M: That seems decadent.

A: Well, it's not full of spirulina powder or pink himalayan sea salt but the lemon makes it pretty over-the-top.

M: I'll drink it in my sauna (abandoned dog house).

A: I'm gonna go crazy with some chickpea water, er, soup.

M: I can't even joke about that.

A: That recipe needs it's own SAD lamp.

M: If eating chickpea water and calling it lunch is what it takes to be skinny I'll just be over here with a large glass of wine shaking my head.

A: Pour me one too.

5 comments:

  1. You guys are awesome. (My autocomplete randomly typed "steak". That detox nonsense made it hungry too.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol at this comment, and the detox is definitely nonsense.

      Delete
  2. I admit to kind of liking Gwyneth, despite all of her nonsense, BUT that chickpea soup recipe is just a bridge too far. The mere thought of it makes me gag.

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  3. Ok, I thought breakfast was the most important meal of the day but after my sip of lemon water and herbal tea, i feel ready to take on the day! Thanks Dr. Junger, Gwyneth and you guys for sharing the wonderful lightness and detoxification strategies.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thought you were just joking about the chlorophyl! The chai gingerbread thing looks nearly yummy and if I won the lotto I would immediately buy you ladies and all readers a "Hush" chair.

    ReplyDelete

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