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Wednesday, May 10, 2017

We Discuss Real Estate.

M: For YOU.

A: What's with the Canadian bungalow.

M: Did you look.

M: I’ll wait.



A: OH HOLY FUCK.

M: 😬😬😬

A: I hadn't flipped through enough photos!

M: Yeah they were banking on that.

M: Look at that manicured yard. Nothing to see here.

A: EVEN THE KITCHEN.

M: HA

M: 🤡🤡🤡

A: EVERY GD ROOM.

M: Clownssssss

A: It's so deeply messed up.

M: It's so great.

A: I imagine the realtor all, "So. Uh. Can we...simplify?"

M: You know they cleared some things out. That's the best part.

A: Oh man, they totes did.

A: Three views from the front porch!

M: Lookit that yard!

A: So much parking! Here's another photo of the paved driveway.

M: Such lovely brick.

A: Lurking life-size clown in the dining room. NBD.

M: Shhhhhhhh he's resting.

A: There is literally a clown wallpaper border in the master bedroom.

M: There's clowns on clowns on clowns.

M: Hidden clowns.

A: No room unscathed.

M: Except the garage. That's for tools.

A: You know Mr. Clown House goes in there to cry when he can't take it.

M: Poor guy.

A: It's real bad in there.

M: This is a clown free zone. THIS IS MY SPACE DONNA.

A: You know she's tried to sneak a few in there.

M: I SAID NO CLOWNS. DR. THOMAS SAID I SHOULD HAVE ONE CLOWN FREE SPACE.

A: But...it's so PLAIN in there!

M: I swear to fuck Donna is that a clown behind your back.

A: I'M RUNNING OUT OF SPACE, HAROLD.

M: Maybe you should say goodbye to the life sized freak show in our dining room DONNA. I haven't had a solid bowel movement in months thanks to that thing.

A: You said you liked Jingles!

M: WE AGREED WE WOULDN'T NAME IT. I'M CALLING DR. THOMAS.

A: You're over-reacting. Come see what I found at the flea market today!

M: Ooh, whadja get?

A: 🤡 🤡 🤡 🤡

M: GOD DAMMIT DONNA.

11 comments:

  1. This.made.my.whole.day.better. I'm literally cry laughing.

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  2. You guys...what if the tools BELONG TO THE CLOWNS.

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  3. I feel like I'm being punked when I look at that listing. It can't be real!!?? That house is effing terrifying!

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  4. It looks like a regular house from the front....and a clown nightmare inside!!!!

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  5. Thank you for this. It made my craptastic day much better.

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  6. You guys crack me up so much.

    There's a kids' room, right? Some kid had to live and sleep in there, and bring friends home (or not).

    Modern Family needs to shoot an episode here.

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  7. I've been condo shopping so I've seen some scary places online - but this takes the clown cake. Jeepers.

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  8. This house is a metaphor for my crazy sister-in-law. Looks normal on the outside...

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  9. That house is in my home town! Apparently, the back story is that the husband had a drinking problem, and to combat the urge to buy a drink, he'd substitute buying some kind of clown thing...does that make it weirder??

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  11. Those agents who aren't acquainted with these sorts of projects for the most part aren't on the level, or they may do not have the experience important to help you buy the home you had always wanted. Kingsford Waterbay Prices

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