We Watched The Princess Switch So You Don't Have To.

For the past couple of years Marianne and I have been watching a terrible holiday movie and posting our (overly long) commentary. Last year we watched A Christmas Prince which at least had wolves and intrigue. This year we watched The Princess Switch which had fake cakes and abs. Also! Marianne has been watching ALL the terrible holiday movies, so check out her IG highlights for ratings. Okay! Let's get this over with:

M: SO ARE WE WATCHING PRINCESS SWITCH OR WHAT

A: YES OKAY

M: The sequel to the Christmas prince is awful

M: So many cardigans and converse

M: I swear the wardrobe budget was “BYOC” bring your own cardigan

A: Ha

A: The first one was like that too

M: Okay I should tell you I love Vanessa Hudgens

A: I have no opinion

A: Chicago, Stacy works in a bakery.

M: Is Kevin gay why isn’t Kevin the love interest

A: He’s her “best friend” and he has a daughter.

A: They’re going to… Belgravia? For a royal baking contest? Sure, okay.

M: Oh a foreign country ending in “ia”

A: Right, very important to get her the fuck outta there

M: Oh god a prince

M: Still reeling from the prince of Aldovia

A: Prince Milque Toast!

M: Oh she’s scared and overworked

M: How will this workaholic find love?!1!

A: She ain’t ready

M: “I JUST WISH I HAD SOMEONE TO SPEND THE HOLIDAYS WITH” is never said outside of these movies

A: Oh no, nasty run-in with her ex!

M: Ew Paul

A: He is awful

A: Stacy, girl. Bullet dodged.

A: Truth

M: Is that old man an angel?

M: Or an elf?

A: Probably both

A: He just shows up and gives rando stranger advice? Cool.

A: Running into her bland ex made her change her mind!

A: And, we’ve landed in Belgravia.

M: Belgravia looks like Minnesota.

A: WHAT ABOUT THE BAKERY, STACY

M: She no currrrr

A: Nice rental house, damn.

M: That shiplap tho!

A: Another old man angel siting

M: ELF

A: Elf! I think you’re right

M: they all speak English in Belgravia I guess

A: Only the elves

A: ROYAL BAKING COMPETITION

A: Not into this prince

M: Nope

M: He was on Nashville

A: Why can’t they find a legit hot dude?

M: So this is like GBBO

A: Sure

A: Oh god I love it. I love a parent trap moment

A: Yes! Perfect

A: I love that nobody in Belgravia mentioned Stacy’s likeness to THE DUCHESS

M: Because she’s a recluse you see

A: Welp

M: A beautiful, thin recluse

A: In a that-ain’t-Chanel suit

M: Typical

M: Stacy, Kevin is cute!

A: Kevin, go for ittttt

A: Kevin is way cuter than the prince

M: Seriously

M: Why does the duchess talk. So. Slow.

A: I spaced out - why does the duchess want to switch with Miss Chicago?

M: To get to know the people of Belgravia as a commoner

A: Cool cool cool

M: Prediction: duchess falls for Kevin

A: I see what’s going to happen here

M: We already know Stacey will fall for the prince

A: Of course, she has shitty taste in men, confirmed by gross ex

M: I am loving these walking lessons

A: She cut her hair for this?

M: When did that happen

A: 🤷🏻‍♀️

A: This is rull bad

M: Ugh

M: This dude

M: Why is it so hard to cast a prince

A: He’s not even charming

A: He’s just an average white dude

M: Lazy eye! Lol

A: With a very tight mouth

M: Ungenerous mouth

M: This haircut is not good

A: Why would anyone agree to this?

M: The princess paying for Kevin’s kids ballet seems like...not enough

A: Cut my hair and pretend to be royalty? Sure, why not.

M: Yeahhhh

A: Return to Shiplap Manor

M: People from Chicago wear Chicago hats

A: Kevin! Digging the Christmas

M: Kevinnnn

M: Wow she adapted to this accent quickly 🙄

A: Amazing, really

A: How is this movie so long

M: I’m pretty sure this plot takes no more than 7 minutes

A: We already figured it out so

A: Stacy is checking out the duchess closet of plenty

M: This closet is just okay honey

A: Yeah, I spy Longchamp which meh

M: Still wearing heels with her robe

A: The prince still bores me

M: He’s like a Ken doll

A: They keep saying schedule the English way to remind you THEY ARE ENGLISH

M: SHEDULE

M: This is a slightly better castle than the Christmas prince castle

A: Have we gotten an exterior shot? Where are the wolves?

M: Brief exterior shot

A: I missed it, I keep blacking out

M: Lol

M: Tiara! Nice.

M: This shade of pink she’s committed to is not good

A: Those fake Chanel suits are awful

M: Really bad

A: Ooh! They’re going riding

M: 🐎

A: Wolves!

M: Always wolves

M: Oh god this movie is so long

A: Where did his helmet come from? He wasn’t wearing it a second ago.

M: Same place as her haircut

M: Pretty horses

A: Yes

A: Wolves??

A: 🐺?

M: Wolf time

A: Bring out the wolves!

A: Ugh, no wolves.

A: I like the party dress

M: Yes me too

M: She looks great

M: Kevin’s kid is kind of a jerk

A: I'm so over this kid

M: Elf Angel!

M: Creeper Santa

A: Oh, this kid. Nope.

M: That castle interior shot looked like a hotel

A: Prince Severe Haircut

A: It’s the Von Trapp Family Inn

M: Lol

M: I am never going to make it to the end what was I thinking suggesting this

A: Like, we still have more than an hour to go

M: 😵

A: That castle looks like a set

M: Coming to you from a resort in Minnesota

A: So, the sequin dress was just around the castle wear?

M: Ha

M: I guess

A: The ball gown is pretty

M: It is

A: Jesus, Prince

A: That was painful

M: Lordy what a loser

A: This movie has no ghosts or wolves, Marianne.

M: 🙄🙄🙄

A: This fundraising event is very well-lit

M: Bright as fuck

A: And a gazebo?

M: Duh, all castles have gazebos

A: Angel elf siting!

M: Haha

A: He is everywhere

A: 16 going on 17?

A: Dancing in the gazebo, of course

M: Duh

A: Return to shiplap manor

M: This is like Joanna Gaines level farmhouse dreams

M: Whoa KEVIN

A: Daaang

M: Kevin eats his cod

A: 🐟

M: This beret is very cute on her

A: It is!

M: Now I want a beret

A: His face is so...

M: Derp

A: YES

A: But you’d look cute in a beret

M: I think I need one

A: Dewit

M: Heh

M: She looks like a flight attendant

A: Yeah, not her best look

A: Nononono

A: They aren’t

M: Oh god Twister

A: Her skirt is too short for that

M: Princess that’s is a short skit for twister

M: Jinx!

M: Angel elf!

A: WHEN DOES SOMETHING HAPPEN

M: I am so sleepy

A: 🐺🐺🐺

A: Me too

M: Oh good gift wrapping

A: Did they just balance wrapped gifts on top of the car?

A: Um

A: That is never gonna work, guys

M: Royals 🙄

A: Can we fast forward to the last five minutes?

M: I am honestly shocked by how little has happened

M: And I watched The Christmas Wedding Planner

A: Hahaaa

M: Oh nice Netflix! They are watching The Christmas Prince!

M: We get it

M: Netflix inception

A: THEY ARE SO BORING

A: EW

M: Oh what is THAT

A: WHAT IS THAT

M: is it made of CANDY Jesus

A: WORST JEWELRY GIFT EVER

A: IS SHE SUPPOSED TO WEAR THAT

M: It’s like a weird key fob

M: Maybe it holds government secrets

A: Like the acorn

M: The acorn!!

A: Inception

M: How many hours are left

A: 29 minutes

M: Fuck

A: I don’t know if I’m gonna make it

M: Kevin also has a terrible necklace

A: That necklace is gigantic

M: It’s like a dog tag

A: These poor girls

M: Kevin is so the catch here

A: Nice arrrrrms

A: Poor Kevin

M: Poor poor Kevin

A: “Did you get to do everything you wanted?”

M: Hahahahaha

A: “Almost”

A: I just cackled

M: One day together and boom, love

A: You got your peanut butter in my chocolate!

M: No you got your Kevin in my Duchess!

M: Prince Mothballs lol

A: Prince Mothballs is creepy af

A: Elf!

M: Angel!

A: The baking competition! FINALLY.

M: Purée he berries by hand!

A: All those cakes are cardboard

M: That is a large fake cake

A: They didn’t even try to make them look real

M: Who is this judge with her terrible mouth

A: Woooorst

M: Okay the villains cake looks cool

M: Shocking, they won.

A: Sorry, that white feather cake got robbed

M: Girl. Stacy is from Chicago.

M: She is not meant to be a princess.

A: Stacy, DO NOT JUST MARRY THIS DUDE

M: Kevin, you in danger

A: RUN KEVIN

A: 😂

M: 🙄🙄🙄

A: This is fucking ridiculous

M: Yes Stacy RUN GURL

A: Trust those instincts!

A: Princess gonna hit that

M: This KID

A: SERIOUSLY

M: Kevinnnnn

A: STACY KEEP RUNNING

M: STACY RUN TO CHICAGO

A: YOU HAVE KNOWN HIM ONE DAY

A: YOU DO NOT LOVE HIM

M: I THINK CHICAGO IS LIKE NEXT STATE OVER

A: HAHAAA WE ARE ONLY IN MINNESOTA

M: No

M: GET UP PRONCE

A: she is his destiny? NONONO

A: OH A ONE YEAR ULTIMATUM THEN WE MARRY

M: oh my fucking god

A: NO GURL

M: I give up on these idiots

A: Pour one out for the feather cake

M: Welp

A: She married that twerp

M: That escalated quickly

M: We didn’t get to see the fallout of the duchess marrying second baker from Chicago

M: Oh wait

M: Duh

M: Not married...yet

A: Bouquet toss shocker

M: Vanessa Hudgens is very cute

A: She is

A: Where’s the elf angel

A: All cakes in this land are fake

M: Heaven prob

M: This is a better wedding than the terrible wedding prince sequel

M: No elf angel resolution!

M: Bullshit

A: Whaaaaat

A: THE END GOD.